Knight in Shining Armor

They were lined down the hall just like the movies. Gleaming silver, they shined with a toughness, a grit that was ironic. The pointed helmet was intimidating, but knowing that they stood tall outside of my bedroom door made me feel protected.

My favorite one was the first one we got. I was only six when Daddy moved it in, put it right outside of my door and said the Knight was there to make sure the monsters stayed out. Little did I know that the worst monster would be a mere boy, and that not even you could protect me from him.

You couldn’t protect me from this. Not from a boy who decided that he no longer wanted my love. You couldn’t protect me from the pain and brokenness that tore at every inch of me, finally making me understand how a heroin addict must feel going through withdrawal.

How could you let this happen?! Why didn’t you warn me to not let this boy in? I shouldn’t have believed the lies he told me of being there for me “for forever” or that “the future was just for us”. You, my Knight, didn’t warn me that while I was falling for him, he wasn’t going to be there to catch me. Why did you let me give myself over to him, heart and soul, never realizing that he was not doing the same for me? You didn’t protect me. My Knight, you failed.

I looked at my Knight, the one that I was promised would keep me safe. I glared at him, betrayed. He seemed even more threatening in the dark, the gleam gone and only the menace left. So I pushed you. Put my two hands on your cold, silver chest and shoved with all my might. I screamed all the while as if to release every ounce of anger and throw it all on you, with everything I had.

He came clamoring down, the clanging reverberating throughout the hallway, the echoes raining down on me.  I fell to my knees, looking at the mess that now laid before me. The hollow metal strewn on the floor was not menacing at all anymore. You couldn’t protect yourself, let alone protect me.

In the silence that seemed so loud after the chaos, I turned over the helmet in my hands. Its tough steel felt smooth. So I slipped the hollow metal over my own face. I stood, feeling taller somehow.

Nothing had ever felt more right than to be own Knight in Shining Armor.

antique armor black and white chrome
Photo by Mikes Photos on Pexels.com

1 thought on “Knight in Shining Armor

  1. So beautiful and so raw. 💯❤ sending you a hug from across the blogosphere.

    Like

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